After 10 hours of cooking....

Ridiculously buttery and melt-in-your mouth blackberry muffins....



Fresh paneer....



A spiced applesauce cake....



And a whole mess of peppers, onions, and garlic.

My friends are coming to visit today. We're going to play League of Legends, board games, and feast until we're too full to move. In the interests of that last goal, I've made them a feast. The menu includes:

Homemade chips and hummus

Minced lamb and peas

Palak paneer (although my paneer didn't turn out. So I picked up some peynir instead.)

Homemade naan

Blackberry muffins (if I'm nice enough to share!)

Spiced applesauce cake with cinnamon frosting

Yeah, I know you wish you were my friend. Birds do like cooking.

You win this round, peanut butter.

I know this picture doesn't look that appetizing. I took it with my phone while starving and not really willing to take the time to figure out how to make it look pretty.



I've made this recipe twice now since discovering it. I wasn't sure I'd like it at first because I used to think that peanut flavor belonged in nothing but dessert, but recently I've been craving it. I have found myself eating just peanut butter and nutella, spread on graham crackers.

You should try that, by the way, because it is delicious.

But the point is, I used to seriously judge my friends whenever they would eat peanut butter out of the jar, and I have many friends who do. And suddenly I find myself thinking 'huh, that isn't such a bad idea after all.' What's happening to me? Next thing you know I'll be not eating meat for days at a time without even trying.

...Oh, wait...

Anyway, enough rambling. Ignore my poor photography, and give this a try. I have changed the recipe slightly in that I added a marinade step, because I think it gives the chicken a lot more flavor. I also think that you should steam the peas before so they aren't SO crunchy, but that may be a personal preference. Some people like them super crunchy.

Recipe modified from The Cooking Photographer.
(Makes 5 servings, with 289 calories and $3.11 per serving)

1 tablespoon light colored oil

5 thin sliced chicken breasts

2 cups snap peas

1 cup chicken broth

1 tablespoon Sriracha

1 tablespoon brown sugar

2 teaspoons fish sauce

1/4 cup fresh lime juice

1 tablespoon creamy peanut butter

3 tablespoons chopped unsalted roasted peanuts

2 green onions

pepper

1. Cut thinly sliced chicken breasts into strips.
   
2. Marinade chicken in chicken broth, Sriracha, brown sugar, fish sauce, some pepper and lime juice for at least three hours.
   
3. Begin steaming snap peas.
   
4. Heat up oil, and saute chicken.
   
5. Add snap peas to skillet and cook for two to three minutes, then add marinade and peanut butter, and cook for about five minutes.
   
6. Add chicken back to wok, and cook until marinade has boiled down.
   
7. Plate, serve with rice and additional lime wedges.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• Steam snow peas. Or they stay crunchy.
  
• When did peanut butter get so delicious?!
  

Pitas appear to be beyond me.

Aha, and ya'll thought I forgot about my mission to re-cook everything I ate in England, didn't you? The one I gave the ridiculously British-sounding name to? Well, I didn't forget at all!

I'm just bad at cooking things in a timely manner, it seems.

The original version of this dish came from the Jazz Cafe, and it was one of the things I was most looking forward to. And it turned out deliciously. Everything except the pita, which I attempted to make on my own. The bread tasted fine, but you know how pitas are supposed to have little pockets, for putting food inside...?

Mine were just sad and flat. I didn't even take a picture of it, because it made me so sad.

I did take a picture of the final product, though.



So many colors! If I had not made whole-wheat pitas, then maybe there would have been even more, but I appear to be obsessed with whole-wheat. I think that's a good thing, it makes me feel healthier.

These are really easy to make. Mixing together the tabbouleh and tzatziki can be day the day before, even, and the lamb patties only take minutes to throw together. It takes a while only to chop everything up by hand. I'm a horrendously slow food chopper, so it still took me about half an hour, but Mama Bird could have done it in probably 10. I guess that should be my next goal: improving my chopping skills...

Recipe from All About You
(Makes 8 servings, with 338 calories and $2.02 per serving)
Lamb Patties

18 ounces ground lamb

4 tablespoons breadcrumbs

1 egg

zest of 1 lemon

2 teaspoons oregano

3 garlic cloves

2 tablespoons olive oil

1. Mix all ingredients but olive oil in bowl until well combined.
   
2. Shape into eight patties.
   
3. Place on tray and chill in fridge for at least 15 minutes.
   
4. Heat oil, and fry over medium to high heat for 4 to 5 minutes each side.
   
5. Drain on kitchen towel.
   
6. Serve with tabbouleh, pita, and tzatziki sauce.
   

Tabbouleh

2 ounces couscous

2 ounces fresh parsley

1 ounce fresh mint

1/2 red onion

3 tablespoons olive oil

3 tablespoons lemon juice

1. Put dry couscous in bowl and pour in 1/2 cup of hot water.
   
2. Stir, then cover and let sit until water is absorbed.
   
3. Fluff with fork, and add remaining ingredients. Chill before serving.
   

Tzatziki Sauce

1 cup greek yogurt

1 cucumber

1 green onion

2 cloves garlic

1 tablespoon mint

3 tablespoons lemon juice

1. Peel and dice cucumber.
   
2. Combine all ingredients and stir well.
   
3. Refrigerate for at least 30 minutes before serving.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• I chop things very slowly.
  
• Pitas without pockets are a lot like naan.
  

More meat, more stuffed

This will be my only post for a while. As you are reading this, I am sitting in a plane, on my way to Madrid. Madrid! I don't speak Spanish at all well enough to be going to Madrid!

Once again, I'm sure I'm going to take pictures of every meal I eat, even though my faithful camera is now broken. For the time being, I'm borrowing one of Mama Bird's old cameras, but I'll probably have to buy a new one soon. I guess I'd mentioned doing it a few times already, so it's not too big of a deal.



But before I go, I'll leave you with one of the things I've been meaning to share for a few weeks now. I made these for friends months ago, and it's high time I shared them. I originally thought that they'd be light, that everyone would be able to eat two zucchini boats apiece and it'd be a nice healthy meal. I didn't realize how much meat that would have been for everyone. Next time I make these, I may half the meat, or at least drop it to 3/4 of a pound.

Recipe from The Homesteading Housewife
(Makes 8 servings, with 250 calories and $1.94 per serving)

4 zucchini

1 onion

1 green bell pepper

4 cloves garlic

1 pound ground beef (or 1/2 pound ground beef and 1/2 pound Italian sausage)

1/2 teaspoon oregano

2 eggs

1/2 cup parmesan cheese

1/2 cup bread crumbs

2 cups mozzarella cheese

1. Preheat oven to 375.
   
2. Wash zucchini, but do not chop stems.
   
3. Put in a pot of cold water, and bring to a boil.
   
4. Let boil 6-7 minutes or until tender, and remove and set aside to cool.
   
5. In a skillet, brown meat and add garlic, onion, oregano, and peppers.
   
6. Slice zucchini lengthwise, and scoop out seeds.
   
7. Chop extra zucchini 'meat' and add to meat mixture.
   
8. Mix bread crumbs, Parmesan, and eggs in with meat, and mix well.
   
9. Fill zucchini boats with meat, and top with mozzarella.
   
10. Bake until cheese is hot and bubbly.
    

Today's lessons learned:

• Stuffed anything is much more filling than you think.
  
• Sometimes, more meat is not the answer. But only sometimes.
  

Mother's Day Baked Ziti

The blog layout finally changed! It's got 99% less birds, 100% less stripes, and 100% more food. Looking at that picture does make me wish I had more of those tacos, though... I'll add them back onto the list of recipes I need to make. First on the list is everything I ate in England. I swear I'll get to that before it's been a full year.

I wasn't sure what I should have shared today. As the first day of my meatless month thought it'd be fitting to share something vegetarian, but I don't have anything vegetarian I've been waiting to share. I was tempted to post the last muffin recipe I have stored just to make it three muffins in a row, but I decided a real meal every now and then is a good idea too.

Not that I couldn't live off muffins. You can put fruits and veggies in those, so don't let anyone tell you a muffin isn't a complete meal.

Mother's day was almost two weeks ago, which is years in blog time. But I never shared when we cooked up for Mama Bird, and that's really a shame, because it was a very filling meal that lasted us for quite a few days.

Yes, I said what 'we' cooked up. Sister Bird and I told Mama Bird that we would take care of dinner for her on Mother's day. I originally was hoping to make her stuffed zucchini, but Sister Bird isn't quite on-board with my desire to be trying new food, so she vetoed it as soon as it was suggested. But since Mama Bird been's bragging to her about what a good cook I am now, she still wanted me to come up with something for us to make.

One thing I've learned about my sister over the years is that she loves meaty, cheesey pasta dishes. So I told her we should make ziti. She vetoed the meatless version, too. It was not a terribly healthy dinner, but you can't win them all.

We also decided to make garlic bread. If I had thought about it more, I would have prepared it differently, but I am rarely known for thinking ahead.



So I just melted some butter, minced some garlic, and stirred them together for a little, then put them on the bread. It was super garlic-y.



Luckily everyone in my life loves garlic. A lot.

So, if I had thought ahead for the garlic bread, I would not have melted the butter, but just left it soften. Then I could have stirred the minced garlic into it, spread it on the bread, and then broiled it. That would have made sense, instead of spooning melted butter and slightly cooked garlic onto pieces of bread.



The baked ziti was HUGE. I don't mean 'oh, it fed our family and we had leftovers the next day' huge. I mean it fed all four of us, Sister Bird took another fourth of it to school with her, and Mama Bird and I ate it for lunch for another four days. It was so bulky that when I put it in the oven it scraped up against the top. There's still melted cheese in the oven now, and you smell it whenever you use the oven.

It's been annoying Mama Bird quite a bit. Happy Mother's Day?



These pictures were extremely rushed, because we were all quite hungry by the time it came out of the oven. Well, I saw all of us, but maybe it was just me. It's so hard to tell sometimes.

Overall, it was a little sweet for me. I don't care for sweetness in most main dishes, and although I think my family agreed it was slightly sweet, no one else had that problem. Don't get me wrong: this was still a meaty, cheesy, pile of delicious pasta. I would have just upped the red pepper flakes and most likely included Sriracha if I had been making it for myself and friends instead of Mama Bird. I also think this was really closer to 16 servings than 12, but we had eaten signifcant salads and a fair bit of super garlic-y bread before we really got into it.

Recipe from Simply Recipes.
(Makes 12 6 ounce servings, with 441 calories and $2.37 per serving)

1 pound ziti pasta

1 pound ground beef, pork, sausage, or a mix

1 onion

3-4 garlic cloves

3/4 tablespoon basil

1 tablespoon thyme

1 tablespoon rosemary

1/2 tablespoon red pepper flakes

32 ounces marinara sauce

1/2 pound mozzarella cheese

1 cup ricotta

1 cup parmesan

1. Preheat oven to 350.
   
2. Bring a pot of water to boil, and cook pasta.
   
3. Brown the meat, adding onion and garlic whenever desired.
   
4. Add herbs once meat has been browned, and stir well.
   
5. Cook about a minute, then add tomato sauce and bring to a simmer.
   
6. Spread a thin layer of sauce in the bottom of casserole pan.
   
7. Spread half of the ricotta over the sauce.
   
8. Mix some of the sauce with the pasta, and then add to pan.
   
9. Spoon the remaining sauce over the pasta, and layer with cheese.
   
10. Bake in the oven until top is browned, about 20 minutes.
    

Today's lessons learned:

• When putting stuff in the oven, make sure there's enough room for it. If not, move the racks down.
  
• Don't get cheese inside the oven, it will smell like burning for weeks.
  

'Authentic' Chicken Vindaloo has habaneros, right?

I have led a sheltered life in terms of Indian food. Papa Bird dislikes curry, and so our family never really experienced Indian while I was growing up. The first time was in England, when we went to The Eastern Eye and I took terrible pictures. And I was smitten almost instantly with the foreign flavors.

When we came back, I dragged Boyfriend Bird to a local Indian place, and then went to a different place with the family. And then I discovered The Indian Slow Cooker: 50 Healthy, Easy, Authentic Recipes, due to my obsession with cooking blogs. The book was written by Anupy Singla of Indian as Apple Pie.

I'm proud to say I didn't immediately one-click purchase the book, because I'm trying to work on my impulse buying. Why, just today I managed to talk myself out of buying a box of cookie cutters. I looked through it on Amazon, saw a few things I really wanted to try, and decided that I'd make one, and if I liked it I would buy it. Like a little test-taste. And oh, rest assured, I purchased the book the same day I made the dish.

I picked out Chicken Vindaloo, because I remembered a waiter telling me that it was one of the spicier things on their menu. I had been disappointed once I actually got the dish- it tasted wonderful, but spicy? There was absolutely no spice to speak of. So I decided that I was going to test and see just how spicy this could be. Besides, the group of friends I was cooking for this time enjoys spice quite a bit.

They probably deserve bird names by now... I shall dub them Ninja Bird, Uncountable Bird, and Ocarina Bird. There. Moving on.

I think Uncountable Bird and I have similar spice tolerances, despite him saying he had a very low one. I think mine is actually lower than I want to admit. Ninja and Ocarina Bird seem like they have a higher but also similar level, and Darth Bird's spice tolerance is absolutely stupid.

Obtaining everything I needed for this was slightly tricky, in that it called for black mustard seeds and I didn't know where to buy those, and the Giant and Harris Teeter near me don't carry the chilis I wanted. Or any of the other peppers she listed. Darth Bird scored the mustard seeds, but I decided I wanted to make sure this vindaloo was spicy, so I just decided to get habanero chilis instead.

Well, that plan certainly worked.

Let's do a quick review of the levels of spicy here... the recipe called for 6-10 bird's eye chilis, serrano peppers, or cayenne peppers. The spiciness of a pepper can be measured with the Scoville Rating. In fact, if you're planning on substituting some peppers for another, it's not a bad idea to try to grab one from the same place on the scale. Bird's eye chilis rank from 50,000 to 100,000, which is nothing to joke around with. Serranos are only 10,000 to 25,000, and cayenne are only slightly hotter at 30,000 to 50,000. So I would have been disappointed if I had got a hold of serrano peppers after all. The only pepper that would really have given me heat would have been the birds eye.

Habanero are ranked at 100,000 to 350,000. So the hottest bird's eye is as potent as the weakest habanero. Thank god I only put three of those suckers in.



Cutting up the onions was actually one of the most time consuming parts of this. Partially because I cut up 12 onions, and partially because I realized I was starting to run behind and I sliced my index finger in the middle of the ninth onion. I then danced around my house, sucking on my finger and whining to my dog. It was nearly five minutes before it stopped bleeding enough for the neosporin to stick to my finger and not just the blood, and then I had to put a big band-aid on it. And call Mama Bird and ask her to chop the habaneros, because there was no way I was touching them with that big of a cut.

I think my pain amused her.



We had nearly uncountable onions.



I also made homemade naan for this little adventure, which I think turned out pretty well. It was slightly less flavorful than I would have hoped, but it was received well enough. Mama and Boyfriend Bird both thought it went really well with hummus, so I guess I know what to do next time I want to mess around with hummus.



This is where two of the major changes to this recipe were made. One was on purpose, the other was entirely accidental. As I said earlier, I switched habanero peppers for serrano, because that was what I had and because I wanted it to be spicy. The accidental change was a direct result of my inability to read, and instead of putting EIGHT inches of ginger root in the mixture, I only put one. That's a lot of missing flavor.



I know this is a bad picture, but I just wanted to make sure that everyone was aware that you cannot grind peppercorns like this. It will not work. Just measure out ground peppercorns next time, unless you have a real mortar and pestle. And then, if you don't, don't dump this mixture in with the onion and watch with despair as they aren't ground at all, and you end up with pureed onions with some peppercorns and mustard seeds.

But if you do, the peppercorns will soften up in the six hours of cooking, and it will be okay. Not perfect. But trust me, it really will not be as bad as you think it will.



Overall, I was pleased with this. I thought it was a great level of spice; it wasn't overpowering, but it built with time so by the end of the meal I had a wonderful burn going. I made the mistake of giving myself too much rice, so I was completely stuffed and couldn't even finish my plate. I tupperware'd it up and it was just as delicious the next day.

When Mama Bird told me that it wasn't spicy at all. Mama Bird is definitely insane.

But Ocarina Bird's father, who dislikes curry, tried this and enjoyed it. So hopefully I'll talk Papa and Boyfriend Bird into trying some too. Otherwise, I guess I'm going to have enough leftovers to last me a week.

Note: I am reprinting this recipe because you can already view it through the Amazon 'take a peek!' feature, and because I accidentally made a few changes anyway. If anyone tells me I really shouldn't post this, I'll take it down.

Chicken Vindaloo adapted from The Indian Slow Cooker: 50 Healthy, Easy, Authentic Recipes
(Makes 13 servings, with 260 calories and $1.65 per serving)

12 medium yellow onions

6 tablespoons vinegar

1 inch ginger

20 cloves garlic

3 habanero chilis

1 tablespoon turmeric

1 tablespoon ground coriander

1 tablespoon garam masala

1 tablespoon black peppercorns

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1 tablespoon coarse salt

1 tablespoon black mustard seed

4 pounds chicken

1/2 cup water

1. Cut up onions and saute, then add vinegar and cook until vinegar has evaporated.
   
2. Puree the onions with rock salt, peppercorns, and mustard seed.
   
3. Puree ginger root, garlic, habaneros (with stems removed), turmeric, coriander, garam masala, and cinnamon.
   
4. Put chicken, ginger puree, and onion puree in slow cooker. Add water, and cook on low for six hours.
   

Naan from Budget Bytes (Makes 8 naan, with 213 calories and $0.44 per naan)

2 teaspoons dry active yeast

1 teaspoon sugar

1/2 cup water

3 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 cup vegetable oil

1/3 cup plain greek yogurt

1 egg

1. Combine yeast, sugar, and water, and let sit for a few minutes.
   
2. Stir in oil, yogurt, and egg until well mixed.
   
3. In separate bowl, combine 1 cup of flour with salt, then wet ingredients.
   
4. Continue adding flour at a half cup at a time until it's impossible to stir with a spoon and doesn't stick to your hands.
   
5. Knead dough ball for about three minutes.
   
6. Loosely cover dough and let rise for about 45 minutes.
   
7. Cut into 8 equal pieces, and shape those into balls.
   
8. Cut a skillet over medium heat and PAM it.
   
9. Roll out one dough ball at a time, and place on skillet.
   
10. Flip once the dough is golden brown on one side.
    
11. Remove and serve warm if possible.
    

Today's lessons learned:

• Just use ground peppercorns.
  
• Habaneros are spicy. Mama Bird is wrong.
  
• 8 inches of ginger and 1 inch of ginger are very different.
  
• If you let your friends draw on your hands with fountain pens, it may take a full week to come off. Very odd.
  

Lamb Chop Shoulders

There's a wine store right next to my job that does weekly wine and beer tastings. So every Friday at 5, some of us will head over there, try some nice drinks, and then go back to work. Well, that's not entirely true. I go grocery shopping and then home afterwards, but almost everyone else goes back to work.

I'm one of the only younger people at my office who comes in 'early.' Early being before nine. Many of them come in at nine or ten, some of them come in even later sometimes. I understand the appeal- why wake up earlier, you're doing the same number of hours, after all- but I like to be home, I guess. I like getting home before it's dark, (maybe) cooking dinner, and just sitting around. The past few days I've been consumed by Pokemon Black. Yes, yes, I know, I can't complain about people in my office coming in later and then talk about Pokemon in the same paragraph. This is why I don't consider myself an adult.

But back to the wine tasting.

I had no real love for wine at the start of my job. Even now I tend to like sweet dessert wines over dark, 'full-bodied' red wines. I don't love the bitterness, although I can like it. Almost a month ago, I bought an expensive bottle of red wine, because I liked it, and as we were tasting it the store owner told us that it would go well a fatty meat, such as lamb. And that got me thinking.

I've had lamb all of twice in my life, and I had certainly never cooked it. So of course I bought an expensive bottle of wine and then immediately went to the nearby Harris Teeter and started looking for lamb.

It actually took me a few weeks to settle on a recipe for it, and the first time I wanted to make it for my friends, I brought the wrong bottle of wine. I pulled it out of the bag I had brought it in, held it up to the light, and noticed that it was distinctly white. So with a sigh, we ordered pizza that night. I may have been the only one sighing that night, but I was quite upset about it. So the next Tuesday night, I subjected everyone to my little adventure.



This was one of the more expensive food adventures I've set out on. The wine and lamb were by far the most expensive parts, but we just didn't seem to have a well-stocked pantry this week so I had to buy a lot of parts for it. Some parts- like the fresh mint I bought only for this- ended up being a mistake because I left them in the fridge, only to be remembered hours after the food was gone. I don't even remember what we ended up doing with it, I just hope it wasn't completely wasted money.



We all thought the lamb smelled very nice as it was cooking, but...



I think this actually smelled the best. The wine smelled amazing, and with the veggies and the cooked lamb just sitting nearby, it was just... amazing. I can't even think of a more descriptive word. I wanted to eat it right then, but everyone was watching, so it wouldn't have been very subtle. And the lamb wasn't done cooking yet.



Sadly, my picture of the final plate was terrible. The flash went off, washing everything out, and I felt weird enough taking a bunch of pictures of people cooking with my friends. They didn't say anything, but I mumbled a few excuses about wanting to show Mama Bird. After the first picture didn't come out, I just decided I'd edit it and fix the lighting. But no, that picture is much too far gone for that.

Oh well. Imagine that, but sitting on a plate on a bed of pasta.

The pasta mixed incredibly well with the sauce, absorbing just a little, but enough to be delicious. I believe everyone enjoyed this, I know I did. However, I probably won't make it again- partially because it wasn't cheap, partially because it wasn't easy on the calories, partially because we also drained that bottle of wine, and partially because there are other ways to cook lamb I want to experiment with.

Braised Lamb Chop Shoulders from Food.com
(Makes 4 servings, with 793 calories and $7.58 per lamb chop)

1 tablespoon olive oil

4 shoulder lamb chops

1 large sweet onion

3 medium carrots

3 large celery ribs

1/2 lemon

1/2 cup red wine

1/4 teaspoon salt

1/8 teaspoon ground pepper

14 ounces tomatoes, diced

1 tablespoon curry powder

1 teaspoon cumin

1 teaspoon coriander

4 cloves garlic

1 tablespoon soy sauce

1/2 cup cold water

1 tablespoon cornstarch

3 -4 sprigs fresh mint, leaves removed and rolled up,cut in thin strips

1. Trim excess fat from the chops.
   
2. Heat oil and brown chops on both sides, roughly five minutes each side.
   
3. Remove lamb from pan and set aside.
   
4. Using the same oil, add quartered onion and saute.
   
5. Add chopped carrots, celery, salt, pepper, and lemon slices.
   
6. Saute about 15 to 20 minutes.
   
7. Stir in wine, and bring to simmer.
   
8. In separate bowl mix together tomato, curry powder, cumin, coriander, garlic, and soy sauce.
   
9. Add tomato mixture to pan and stir.
   
10. Return lamb chops to pan and cover with mixture.
    
11. Bring to a boil, reduce heat, and simmer for an hour.
    
12. Mix water and cornstarch. Stir into pan and bring to a boil, and let simmer until the sauce is thick.
    
13. Serve and sprinkle with fresh mint.
    

I've been up to a lot of cooking recently. I made cookies for a friend, black bean 'gloop,' Jalapeño Cheddar cornbread, and even more cornbread in the form of muffins. I completely failed to take pictures of the cookies, but everything else will be showing up eventually. This week I'll (hopefully!) be making naan, possibly sugar cookies, and some slow-cooked chicken vindaloo. I also splurged (again...) and bought Artisan Bread in Five Minutes a Day because everyone in the cooking blogosphere seems to love it, and the idea of making my own bread intrigues me. True, I don't often eat sandwiches, but Mama Bird will when we have the meat, and... and I wanted the book. Sigh. Maybe I'll save money next month...

Today's lessons learned:

• De-glazing is the process of getting food off the bottom of the pan, not the burnt black stuff.
  

Four Pounds of Frozen Turkey, huh.

I talked Mama Bird into cleaning out our huge freezer in the basement on Monday. Why? I have no idea. Maybe I'm crazy, or maybe I just like knowing what's going to waste in our house. The second is more likely this time. I've spent far too much money this month on things- mostly on myself, but on other people too! Sister Bird and I are going to go see Wicked, and I bought the tickets for that, I (finally) secured one of Boyfriend Bird's birthday presents (only a few months late, too), I got myself a tattoo, and somehow have spent 160 on groceries.

Yes, we are gonna gloss right over that tattoo comment. But I'll post pictures of it someday.

We found a lot of things in that freezer that I intend to use. Frozen cherries, for one, that will either be my next muffins or will become cobbler. We also found a ton of frozen meat, including four pounds of ground turkey, two or three of ground beef, and the holy grail of Omaha Steak purchases. So my cooking will be dedicated to cleaning out the cabinets for a little while instead of buying new things.

Which is a shame because I have already picked out the recipes I need to make the lamb pita for mission: dodgy grub. Putting it off for longer is taking quite a toll on my patience. I also bought a kitchen scale for no apparent reason, but I can now measure portions even better than before.

But the realization that I've let frugality escape me, and the purchase of this scale, has made me decide to try something new with the blog. I'm going to start calculating the cost of a meal when I post a recipe, so I can keep track of things I should make when I've gone overboard on buying again. The scale should also help me track portions better, so I will attempt to calculate how many servings and calories per serving are in each recipe. Who knows how accurate the measurements will be, but I'm sure it'll help me.

With all that said, what did I do with those four pounds of turkey? One is still relaxing in the freezer, waiting for me to consume it. The other three pounds were relocated to .Hack and 80s Birds' apartment, where Boyfriend Bird and I made it into burgers. I was a little skeptical of it, because although I know turkey can be substituted for ground beef in pretty much any recipe, I thought I'd miss the flavor. I won't lie, you know these are turkey. But you don't miss the beef at all. They're juicy, flavorful, and you don't even feel guilty eating them. I came extremely close to eating two.

Actually Delicious Turkey Burgers from All Recipes
(Makes 12 burgers, about $0.93 and 175 calories per burger)

3 pounds ground turkey

1/4 cup seasoned bread crumbs

1/4 cup finely diced onion

2 egg whites, lightly beaten

1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley

1 clove garlic, peeled and minced

1 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper

1. Mix everything together and form into 12 patties.
   
2. Cook in a medium-heat skillet or on a grill.
   

See? Extremely easy, cheap, and healthy. Don't forget to factor in the bun if you're counting calories, but your entire burger will probably only be about 300 calories. A little more if you're like me and add extra diced red onion and some smears of Sriracha.

Today's lessons learned:

• Ground turkey is not something to dread.
  
• Boyfriend Bird is quite skilled at dicing things...
  

Meatballs don't need to be slow cooked.

Today was an inspirational experience for me. I went downstairs to elliptical (just some basic intervals), and couldn't find my sports bra. I looked through the dryer, the washer, the baskets of clean (and dirty) clothes, and came up with nothing. So I grabbed a towel instead, and headed to my shower, smiling to myself and thinking 'oh well, what difference is missing one day gonna make?'

Then I thought about how I hadn't run on Friday, or on Saturday. I felt slightly guilty, but hey, I was busy both days, and there just hadn't been time. And then I realized if I skipped today I'd be my third day off. And then I thought about what a easy thing it would be to just stop running altogether and go back to lazing around everyday. And then suddenly it was easy to go find a bra, and went and did my running for the day.

It's interesting to think how easy it'd be to stop trying to lose weight. But I am too vain for that.

The rest of my weekend was not nearly as inspirational. If anything, it was a little disappointing. I may not have done a full year of cooking in my slow cooker, but I think my friends might say that I get overly excited when I get to use mine. It feels like lazy cooking: do a little work, then sit around and smell the food cooking all day, and bask in compliments when it turns out well. What part of that doesn't sound great?

So when some of my friends were getting together over this weekend, I decided that I wanted to cook. I had been craving meatball subs all week, and seeing as it was a group of guys, I figured they'd be more than happy to have some simple subs. But I didn't want to be cooking while we were hanging out, so I had the genius idea to make them in the slow cooker.

I don't think anyone was surprised by this turn of events.

But since we were meeting at someone's parent's house, they suggested I doubled the recipe so we could offer his parents dinner as well. And we all agreed that yes, we definitely had to do that, because it'd be rude to use their kitchen without offering them any food. After some more minor debates about how many meatballs I could expect each of them to eat (I was assured that it was more than I thought they could), we decided that just doubling the recipe would be the best way to go. As I was standing in the grocery store, holding four pounds of meat, I thought to myself, 'Wow, 4 pounds of meat to feed maybe 10 people?' I probably should have thought it through a little more.

My first concern came when I finished putting all the tomato and onion and garlic in the slow cooker, and realized there was no way that it could possibly hold that much sauce and four pounds of meat. It also looked awfully thin. But it smelled good, and I just turned it on and let it go for four hours. Then when I came back, I admitted defeat. There was no way four pounds of meatballs would fit in my slow cooker, as big as it was.

We transferred it to a bigger slow cooker, and I plopped the meatballs in, pleased that they (barely) fit. What I didn't think about was that this new crock pot wasn't warm at all. It took it an hour to warm up, and by then everyone was starving and the meatballs were nowhere near cooked. So we transfered everything to a big pot and just boiled them for 10 minutes, and then feasted. And boiled some canned pasta sauce because mine was just too thin to put on subs.

The meatballs tasted fine. But the experience was certainly saddening. This was yet another 'I'd like to try this again because I messed up' recipes. I'm collecting far too many of those.

Chile Verde

Yesterday, I made chile verde from A Year of Slow Cooking. I've made an effort to be more frugal in my groceries, as I usually decided I wanted to make something then go buy all the ingredients. So I decided to start watching the sale items for the week and then make something based off that, or at least based off what meat was on sale. Before we went to England (more on that later) last week, I bought almost five pounds of chuck roast with no idea what to do with it.

And to no one's surprise, I ended up on A Year of Slow Cooking, and picked that. I had never actually touched a tomatillo before, and I went the extra mile and bought fresh sage and cilantro. I spent probably an hour and a half hand-chopping all the fresh ingredients the night before, knowing I'd never do it in the morning.

Well, I did use the chopper-thing, so I guess I can't say I chopped it by hand. But it did take me almost an hour and a half.

It looked amazing the next morning, and it smelled great even after it had only been in for a few minutes. I was concerned that the meat would dry out since there wasn't much moisture, but it sank during the day and Mama Bird stirred it a little too.

Boyfriend Bird told me I needed to start learning to plate food, if I really wanted to be a foodie. I stuck my tongue out at him, but then spent a little time trying to make it look pretty. I think I had succeeded before I just drizzled fat all over the burrito-taco, but since I didn't have great lighting and had to use flash, I don't think it looks great anyway. So Boyfriend Bird decided to one-up me.

I maintain that it wasn't fair because I had rolled my food up, so it wasn't a great comparison, but he just said I should have thought of that. He wanted me to make sure that I pointed out the artistic way he drizzled his fat in loops. I told him I'd be sure to point it out.

As for the food, though, I was somewhat disappointed. I didn't think it had tons of flavor; I would have found it bland if not for the rice. I'm hoping that having it sit in the fridge for another day will have made it better, but we'll see. I think I may have added too little spices, as I had almost an extra pound of meat in the pot. But even still, I'm not convinced. I'll see if it's better now that it's sat.

New Year's Cooking

I have been bad at cooking since New Year's. And even worse at dieting, truth be told. I made it halfway to my goal- 20 pounds down, and 20 to go!- but I've been eating terribly for the last week and a half. So I've gained two pounds back, which has lead me to the conclusion that I need to start running. Of course, I won't be doing that right now. We have a family vacation coming up, so I'll be starting running after we come back from that. Hopefully Netflix will help me along.

But, I wanted to continue my health crusade with my morning muffins at work. Mama Bird got me a cupcake holder for Christmas, so I can safely bring muffins into work in the morning without wasting bags, or letting them get squashed. Of course, most muffins aren't healthy, so of course I tried to make something healthy. So I made cornbread muffins from The Hillbilly Housewife. I was a little curious by it not having sugar, but figured that she knew what she was doing.



The tops of the muffins collapsed, and I thought it was funny. I grabbed one while they were warm, and took a big bite. I barely managed to finish chewing it, and tossed mine in the trash. Sister Bird didn't believe they could be that bad, and also did the same thing. Boyfriend Bird insisted they couldn't be that bad, and said if I kept them for him then he'd take them home with him and eat them.

I told him he was very, very wrong, but held onto them since he was coming for dinner that night. He arrived, and forced himself to eat a whole one while I laughed at his horrified face. He was very, very sweet about it, but finally admitted that yes, he did not want to take them home, and they were pretty bad.

Luckily, the stew I made went over very well.



Using both Rotel Original and taco sauce was too much for my family, and they thought it was almost overly spicy. I thought it was quite good, and would make it again. I might use more potatoes and carrots, as I thought it could have used a little more veggie. But we also used beef tenderloin, so I think I just wanted more stuff to balance up the meat.

I had a bit of an OCD fit over the short winter break, and went through two of the three freezers in our house. I threw away a lot of food that was past good. Some frozen meals that were labeled as expiring in 2007, some meals I recall my mother making right after the end of the school year, some bags of things that had been ripped and were completely frostbitten... and the worse, finding somehow a bottle of red wine had exploded in the freezer and I had to clean the sticky up. Mama and Papa Bird were very, very appreciative, though, and now we have a checklist of everything in the freezers and when they'll expire. We're working through it slowly, and it makes me happy.

I've had a lot of ideas for things I'd like to do with this blog. Self challenges, things like that. Things like using that homemade ice cream maker to make a big vat of vanilla ice cream, then making a bunch of homemade syrups and just trying them all out. I also really want to go through all of Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives, and cook everything from there that sounds interesting. That, however, will take a right long time. It's also really hard to find those episodes anywhere without buying the DVDs, and while I like the show, I don't think I like it enough to buy it. So hopefully I'll make more use of this. =)

Spinach Stuffed Chicken

Last week, I went above and beyond the call of duty and planned a whole week of menus for my family, which was mostly just Mama Bird and I. I also went above and beyond the Call of Duty to fight Nazi Zombies, but that's hardly related. (We only survived to round twelve. I am not very good at fighting Nazi Zombies, apparently.)

One of the things I had planned on making last week was Broccoli Stuffed Chicken, not that I had any particular recipe picked out for it. It just sounded cool, and I wanted to try it. But Mama Bird pointed out we didn't have broccoli, just spinach, and both of us were too lazy to go to Giant to buy any. So we decided to make spinach stuffed chicken. It's got more alliteration to it, anyhow. And because I am brave and bold, I opted to not use a recipe. (Mama Bird advised me a lot. A lot.)

And it turned out pretty good! You can't tell from these pictures, as I'm a terrible photographer, but... use your imagination. They honestly weren't complicated: pound some chicken breasts so they're sort of flat, put cheese on them, and then put spinach on the cheese. Fold it, toothpick it, put bread crumbs on them if you do desire, and put em in the oven until they're done! Then eat. I'd advise you let them cool, but hey, what do I know.

I put pepper jack in mine, and Mama Bird got swiss, since she tells me I make things too spicy sometimes. I thought it was awesome with pepper jack, it gave it a little kick that it totally needed.

A not so artsy picture of them coming out of the oven. Notice the pool of melted cheese, breadcrumbs, and chicken juice in the middle. Poor planning on my part.

And this highlights the other problem I had with it: the folded end was just entirely chicken, no spinach. So I think next time I might mess around with cutting the chicken and trying to make a chicken sandwich. Yes, I know, not quite the idea, but it'd be interesting, wouldn't it? We'll see what happens.

Spinach Stuffed Chicken from the Bird
(Serves 2, approximately $4.93 per serving)
Ingredients

2 chicken breasts

3 ounces baby spinach

1 teaspoon Italian seasoning

1 teaspoon onion flakes

2 slices Pepperjack, or desired cheese

1/2 cup Italian seasoned bread crumbs

Directions

1. Boil or steam spinach.
   
2. While spinach is cooking, flatten chicken breasts as much as possible.
   
3. Place a piece of cheese on each breast.
   
4. Remove spinach from pot or steamer, and mix with Italian seasoning and onion flakes.
   
5. Spoon spinach onto cheese, and fold chicken breast over.
   
6. Secure with toothpick.
   
7. Sprinkle breadcrumbs over top.
   
8. Bake at 350 for 25 minutes, or until done.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• 'Flatten chicken' does not mean do it until you're bored, it means flatten the chicken.
  

Mongolian Beef, a love affair

This picture was taken with my phone, so it's really not a great picture. It is Mongolian Beef from A Year of Slow Cooking, one of my favorite cooking blogs. The modifications I made are down at the bottom of this. Her blog is the only cooking blog I really follow, aside from TasteSpotting, which I don't consider a blog. I made the sauce and cut the flank steak at home, and then took it to Statt Bird's apartment, where I cornstarch'd the meat and then plopped in all in the slow cooker for about six hours. I stirred it far too often.

But my friend's apartment smelt like delicious slow cooking flank steak, garlic, onion, along with soy sauce, ginger, red pepper flakes, and more.  This was my third time making it, and it has never failed to amaze.  I also made a bed of white rice and steamed broccoli to go along with it, although I didn't make enough broccoli or rice. We didn't have a big enough pot for more than three cups of rice, and I had six heads of broccoli. A bird friend I wasn't expecting also came, and although we had more than enough meat (which I did not expect at all), we did not have enough sides for everyone to get as much as they wanted.

Overall, the Mongolian Beef was a success. One of my bird friends (who I believe I will dub Jujyfruits Bird. He'd understand.) had me send his girlfriend the recipe, and she assured me 'if he says that it's really good twice, then he really likes it.'

After dinner we were going to just play games and then I was going to make apple dumplings around 10 or so. We ended up going to a local game night and playing Killer Bunnies. The game made no sense, largely because the directions were far too complicated, and I didn't really enjoy it much at all. It also meant we didn't get home until 11, and I was in no mood to eat the dumplings at midnight or later, so we didn't do them. We may tonight.

Today, aside from going to Statt Bird's again, Boyfriend Bird and I are going to make pizza bagels (again), and do who knows what for dinner. My only goals for the day are to finish my writing for NaNoWriMo, make the dumplings, and take a shower when I am home. I'd like to also play some Fable, or do some reading, but. I know how my life gets out of control.

Thanksgiving this week! I am in charge of making appetizers for Mama Bird, although I will be at Boyfriend Bird's house before our Thanksgiving dinner. I will probably get her to try to slow cook things. I am becoming a slow cooking monster.

Mongolian Beef from A Year of Slow Cooking
(Serves 4+, approximately $12.25 per serving)

Ingredients

1.5 pounds flank steak

4 cloves of chopped garlic

3 sliced green onions, and an extra you'll never remember to put as garnish that will eventually be thrown away in frustration when you find it a month later.

1/2 an onion, diced

1/2 cup soy sauce

1/4 cup white wine

1/4 cup cooking sherry

1/2 tablespoon white wine vinegar, or red wine or whatever random 'flavor' of vinegar you have

1 teaspoon sesame oil

1 teaspoon molasses

1 teaspoon ginger

1/4 teaspoon black pepper, or however many grinds you want until you get bored.

1.5 teaspoons red chili pepper flakes

1/2 tablespoon peanut butter

1 tablespoon brown sugar

1/4 cup cornstarch

Directions

1. Add all ingredients except the meat and cornstarch to slow cooker.
   
2. Slice meat into thin strips, or little chunks.
   
3. Toss meat in bag with cornstarch, coating as best you can.
   
4. Put meat in slow cooker, stirring slightly to coat in sauce.
   
5. Cover and cook on low for about 5 hours.
   
6. Serve over rice with broccoli, or whatever veggies you're after.
   
7. If you remember, garnish with extra green onion on top. You will never remember this step.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• Sometimes you don't need or want dessert. This happens rarely.
  
• It is okay to walk away from a bad board game.
  
• I need to learn to better judge how much food I'm making.