Butternut Squash Soup

Mama Bird has been pretty amazing recently.  Not only did she magically produce a brand new immersion blender from our basement when I mentioned I was thinking of buying one, she signed us up for a Community Supported Agriculture.  If you don't know what that is, it means that every Wednesday for the next two months we get a box of locally grown vegetables.  I was quite excited about it when she brought the idea up to me, because I knew that it meant I'd be getting vegetables to play with that I had never cooked.  Sure enough, last week we had a butternut squash and some leeks.  I haven't messed with the leeks, although Mama Bird stole the potatoes that were meant to become the chips for the fish and chips I'll be making sometime this week.  Hopefully Thursday or Friday, if Skyrim doesn't steal my entire life.

I wasn't sure I'd like this soup, because I've never been a huge squash fan, and I don't tend to enjoy sweetness.  But I liked this.  I dipped some bread in it at first, but I don't think it needs that.  It tastes thick, like it has cream, but it's all healthy.  I'm hoping to eat it for lunch this week to make up for the amount of naughtiness I've been eating- remember that coconut ice?  It's all gone now.  I throw out the remaining third after I gained enough strength to resist it.  Sadly, I didn't ever take a picture of it...   nor do I have a picture of this soup.  It just doesn't look great, sadly.

But it tastes good.  If you want a light healthy soup, give it a shot.

Recipe from A Year of Slow Cooking.

1 butternut squash

2 tablespoons olive oil

2 onions

4 cups vegetable broth

2 apples

1.5 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon black pepper

1/4 teaspoon nutmeg

1/4 teaspoon cloves

1/4 teaspoon coriander

1/4 teaspoon cinnamon

1. Cut squash in half longways, microwaving if the skin is too tough.
   
2. Scoop out seeds.
   
3. Coat in olive oil and roast at 400 for 15 minutes.
   
4. In slow cooker, combine cubed and peeled apples, onion, broth, and spices.
   
5. Cover and cook on high while waiting for squash.
   
6. Peel squash, and cut into cubes.
   
7. Cook on low for 8 hours.
   
8. Blend.
   

'Authentic' Chicken Vindaloo has habaneros, right?

I have led a sheltered life in terms of Indian food. Papa Bird dislikes curry, and so our family never really experienced Indian while I was growing up. The first time was in England, when we went to The Eastern Eye and I took terrible pictures. And I was smitten almost instantly with the foreign flavors.

When we came back, I dragged Boyfriend Bird to a local Indian place, and then went to a different place with the family. And then I discovered The Indian Slow Cooker: 50 Healthy, Easy, Authentic Recipes, due to my obsession with cooking blogs. The book was written by Anupy Singla of Indian as Apple Pie.

I'm proud to say I didn't immediately one-click purchase the book, because I'm trying to work on my impulse buying. Why, just today I managed to talk myself out of buying a box of cookie cutters. I looked through it on Amazon, saw a few things I really wanted to try, and decided that I'd make one, and if I liked it I would buy it. Like a little test-taste. And oh, rest assured, I purchased the book the same day I made the dish.

I picked out Chicken Vindaloo, because I remembered a waiter telling me that it was one of the spicier things on their menu. I had been disappointed once I actually got the dish- it tasted wonderful, but spicy? There was absolutely no spice to speak of. So I decided that I was going to test and see just how spicy this could be. Besides, the group of friends I was cooking for this time enjoys spice quite a bit.

They probably deserve bird names by now... I shall dub them Ninja Bird, Uncountable Bird, and Ocarina Bird. There. Moving on.

I think Uncountable Bird and I have similar spice tolerances, despite him saying he had a very low one. I think mine is actually lower than I want to admit. Ninja and Ocarina Bird seem like they have a higher but also similar level, and Darth Bird's spice tolerance is absolutely stupid.

Obtaining everything I needed for this was slightly tricky, in that it called for black mustard seeds and I didn't know where to buy those, and the Giant and Harris Teeter near me don't carry the chilis I wanted. Or any of the other peppers she listed. Darth Bird scored the mustard seeds, but I decided I wanted to make sure this vindaloo was spicy, so I just decided to get habanero chilis instead.

Well, that plan certainly worked.

Let's do a quick review of the levels of spicy here... the recipe called for 6-10 bird's eye chilis, serrano peppers, or cayenne peppers. The spiciness of a pepper can be measured with the Scoville Rating. In fact, if you're planning on substituting some peppers for another, it's not a bad idea to try to grab one from the same place on the scale. Bird's eye chilis rank from 50,000 to 100,000, which is nothing to joke around with. Serranos are only 10,000 to 25,000, and cayenne are only slightly hotter at 30,000 to 50,000. So I would have been disappointed if I had got a hold of serrano peppers after all. The only pepper that would really have given me heat would have been the birds eye.

Habanero are ranked at 100,000 to 350,000. So the hottest bird's eye is as potent as the weakest habanero. Thank god I only put three of those suckers in.



Cutting up the onions was actually one of the most time consuming parts of this. Partially because I cut up 12 onions, and partially because I realized I was starting to run behind and I sliced my index finger in the middle of the ninth onion. I then danced around my house, sucking on my finger and whining to my dog. It was nearly five minutes before it stopped bleeding enough for the neosporin to stick to my finger and not just the blood, and then I had to put a big band-aid on it. And call Mama Bird and ask her to chop the habaneros, because there was no way I was touching them with that big of a cut.

I think my pain amused her.



We had nearly uncountable onions.



I also made homemade naan for this little adventure, which I think turned out pretty well. It was slightly less flavorful than I would have hoped, but it was received well enough. Mama and Boyfriend Bird both thought it went really well with hummus, so I guess I know what to do next time I want to mess around with hummus.



This is where two of the major changes to this recipe were made. One was on purpose, the other was entirely accidental. As I said earlier, I switched habanero peppers for serrano, because that was what I had and because I wanted it to be spicy. The accidental change was a direct result of my inability to read, and instead of putting EIGHT inches of ginger root in the mixture, I only put one. That's a lot of missing flavor.



I know this is a bad picture, but I just wanted to make sure that everyone was aware that you cannot grind peppercorns like this. It will not work. Just measure out ground peppercorns next time, unless you have a real mortar and pestle. And then, if you don't, don't dump this mixture in with the onion and watch with despair as they aren't ground at all, and you end up with pureed onions with some peppercorns and mustard seeds.

But if you do, the peppercorns will soften up in the six hours of cooking, and it will be okay. Not perfect. But trust me, it really will not be as bad as you think it will.



Overall, I was pleased with this. I thought it was a great level of spice; it wasn't overpowering, but it built with time so by the end of the meal I had a wonderful burn going. I made the mistake of giving myself too much rice, so I was completely stuffed and couldn't even finish my plate. I tupperware'd it up and it was just as delicious the next day.

When Mama Bird told me that it wasn't spicy at all. Mama Bird is definitely insane.

But Ocarina Bird's father, who dislikes curry, tried this and enjoyed it. So hopefully I'll talk Papa and Boyfriend Bird into trying some too. Otherwise, I guess I'm going to have enough leftovers to last me a week.

Note: I am reprinting this recipe because you can already view it through the Amazon 'take a peek!' feature, and because I accidentally made a few changes anyway. If anyone tells me I really shouldn't post this, I'll take it down.

Chicken Vindaloo adapted from The Indian Slow Cooker: 50 Healthy, Easy, Authentic Recipes
(Makes 13 servings, with 260 calories and $1.65 per serving)

12 medium yellow onions

6 tablespoons vinegar

1 inch ginger

20 cloves garlic

3 habanero chilis

1 tablespoon turmeric

1 tablespoon ground coriander

1 tablespoon garam masala

1 tablespoon black peppercorns

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1 tablespoon coarse salt

1 tablespoon black mustard seed

4 pounds chicken

1/2 cup water

1. Cut up onions and saute, then add vinegar and cook until vinegar has evaporated.
   
2. Puree the onions with rock salt, peppercorns, and mustard seed.
   
3. Puree ginger root, garlic, habaneros (with stems removed), turmeric, coriander, garam masala, and cinnamon.
   
4. Put chicken, ginger puree, and onion puree in slow cooker. Add water, and cook on low for six hours.
   

Naan from Budget Bytes (Makes 8 naan, with 213 calories and $0.44 per naan)

2 teaspoons dry active yeast

1 teaspoon sugar

1/2 cup water

3 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 cup vegetable oil

1/3 cup plain greek yogurt

1 egg

1. Combine yeast, sugar, and water, and let sit for a few minutes.
   
2. Stir in oil, yogurt, and egg until well mixed.
   
3. In separate bowl, combine 1 cup of flour with salt, then wet ingredients.
   
4. Continue adding flour at a half cup at a time until it's impossible to stir with a spoon and doesn't stick to your hands.
   
5. Knead dough ball for about three minutes.
   
6. Loosely cover dough and let rise for about 45 minutes.
   
7. Cut into 8 equal pieces, and shape those into balls.
   
8. Cut a skillet over medium heat and PAM it.
   
9. Roll out one dough ball at a time, and place on skillet.
   
10. Flip once the dough is golden brown on one side.
    
11. Remove and serve warm if possible.
    

Today's lessons learned:

• Just use ground peppercorns.
  
• Habaneros are spicy. Mama Bird is wrong.
  
• 8 inches of ginger and 1 inch of ginger are very different.
  
• If you let your friends draw on your hands with fountain pens, it may take a full week to come off. Very odd.
  

Chile Verde

Yesterday, I made chile verde from A Year of Slow Cooking. I've made an effort to be more frugal in my groceries, as I usually decided I wanted to make something then go buy all the ingredients. So I decided to start watching the sale items for the week and then make something based off that, or at least based off what meat was on sale. Before we went to England (more on that later) last week, I bought almost five pounds of chuck roast with no idea what to do with it.

And to no one's surprise, I ended up on A Year of Slow Cooking, and picked that. I had never actually touched a tomatillo before, and I went the extra mile and bought fresh sage and cilantro. I spent probably an hour and a half hand-chopping all the fresh ingredients the night before, knowing I'd never do it in the morning.

Well, I did use the chopper-thing, so I guess I can't say I chopped it by hand. But it did take me almost an hour and a half.

It looked amazing the next morning, and it smelled great even after it had only been in for a few minutes. I was concerned that the meat would dry out since there wasn't much moisture, but it sank during the day and Mama Bird stirred it a little too.

Boyfriend Bird told me I needed to start learning to plate food, if I really wanted to be a foodie. I stuck my tongue out at him, but then spent a little time trying to make it look pretty. I think I had succeeded before I just drizzled fat all over the burrito-taco, but since I didn't have great lighting and had to use flash, I don't think it looks great anyway. So Boyfriend Bird decided to one-up me.

I maintain that it wasn't fair because I had rolled my food up, so it wasn't a great comparison, but he just said I should have thought of that. He wanted me to make sure that I pointed out the artistic way he drizzled his fat in loops. I told him I'd be sure to point it out.

As for the food, though, I was somewhat disappointed. I didn't think it had tons of flavor; I would have found it bland if not for the rice. I'm hoping that having it sit in the fridge for another day will have made it better, but we'll see. I think I may have added too little spices, as I had almost an extra pound of meat in the pot. But even still, I'm not convinced. I'll see if it's better now that it's sat.

New Year's Cooking

I have been bad at cooking since New Year's. And even worse at dieting, truth be told. I made it halfway to my goal- 20 pounds down, and 20 to go!- but I've been eating terribly for the last week and a half. So I've gained two pounds back, which has lead me to the conclusion that I need to start running. Of course, I won't be doing that right now. We have a family vacation coming up, so I'll be starting running after we come back from that. Hopefully Netflix will help me along.

But, I wanted to continue my health crusade with my morning muffins at work. Mama Bird got me a cupcake holder for Christmas, so I can safely bring muffins into work in the morning without wasting bags, or letting them get squashed. Of course, most muffins aren't healthy, so of course I tried to make something healthy. So I made cornbread muffins from The Hillbilly Housewife. I was a little curious by it not having sugar, but figured that she knew what she was doing.



The tops of the muffins collapsed, and I thought it was funny. I grabbed one while they were warm, and took a big bite. I barely managed to finish chewing it, and tossed mine in the trash. Sister Bird didn't believe they could be that bad, and also did the same thing. Boyfriend Bird insisted they couldn't be that bad, and said if I kept them for him then he'd take them home with him and eat them.

I told him he was very, very wrong, but held onto them since he was coming for dinner that night. He arrived, and forced himself to eat a whole one while I laughed at his horrified face. He was very, very sweet about it, but finally admitted that yes, he did not want to take them home, and they were pretty bad.

Luckily, the stew I made went over very well.



Using both Rotel Original and taco sauce was too much for my family, and they thought it was almost overly spicy. I thought it was quite good, and would make it again. I might use more potatoes and carrots, as I thought it could have used a little more veggie. But we also used beef tenderloin, so I think I just wanted more stuff to balance up the meat.

I had a bit of an OCD fit over the short winter break, and went through two of the three freezers in our house. I threw away a lot of food that was past good. Some frozen meals that were labeled as expiring in 2007, some meals I recall my mother making right after the end of the school year, some bags of things that had been ripped and were completely frostbitten... and the worse, finding somehow a bottle of red wine had exploded in the freezer and I had to clean the sticky up. Mama and Papa Bird were very, very appreciative, though, and now we have a checklist of everything in the freezers and when they'll expire. We're working through it slowly, and it makes me happy.

I've had a lot of ideas for things I'd like to do with this blog. Self challenges, things like that. Things like using that homemade ice cream maker to make a big vat of vanilla ice cream, then making a bunch of homemade syrups and just trying them all out. I also really want to go through all of Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives, and cook everything from there that sounds interesting. That, however, will take a right long time. It's also really hard to find those episodes anywhere without buying the DVDs, and while I like the show, I don't think I like it enough to buy it. So hopefully I'll make more use of this. =)

You are not a Carnivore!

One thing that has always driven me crazy has been when people refer to someone as a 'carnivore.' It's normally vegetarians who do it, in my experience, although I know other people do it as well. It drives me crazy because no one is a carnivore, no one. No one eats only meat. So why say something so inaccurate?

Of course, the reason this mostly irritates me is that 90% of the time it comes up, it's a vegetarian describing a dish, saying 'this dish is so good it'll trick even carnivores!' No, it won't trick carnivores, I don't care how good your veggie burger is. That doesn't mean they won't like it. If I eat a veggie burger or something, I know it's not meat, but that doesn't mean I'm going to spit it out and hate it.

I guess what really bothers me is just people who refer to others as carnivores. They're not. They're omnivores, even if they like meat more.

But, in case I annoyed anyone with my rant, here is a vegetarian recipe! In fact, I would say it's almost vegan, but I top it with cheese. The other day I made a black bean soup from A Year of Slow Cooking, which is obviously my favorite cooking site. I made it because I wanted to have something healthy after having a few days of rough dieting, and I was tired of eating boring lunches. So I made this for just Mama Bird and I, as well as some cornbread, and it was my lunch for more than a week.

I was nervous about it at first because the texture took a little getting used to, and it really looks like chocolate pudding. But it tastes delicious. With hot Rotel and just normal taco sauce, it had enough of a kick to satisfy me. I put a little in the freezer, but I feel like defrosting it watered it down a bit, which was a little disappointing. I really liked it, overall, and am definitely going to be making it again, maybe in a month or so.

And now my family migrates north to visit more birds. We'll see how much I end up eating. (Hint: it will be a lot.)


Black Bean Soup from A Year of Slow Cooking
(Serves ~6, approximately $1.43 per serving)
Ingredients

46.5oz black beans

10oz diced tomatoes

2 cups of broth, vegetable or chicken

2 tablespoons taco sauce

1.5 cups frozen vegetables

Directions

1. Blend vegetables together in blender.
   
2. Empty all ingredients into crockpot, without rinsing, and stir.
   
3. Cook on low for 8-10 hours.
   
4. Blend everything to a smooth texture.
   
5. Serve with some cheese and cornbread.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• If you try to puree the vegetables directly from the freezer, be prepared to wake the whole house.
  

The Thanksgiving Feast from the Bird's Nest

I'm a few days late on this one, but Thanksgiving was great! I tried to have two Thanksgiving dinners, one with Boyfriend Bird's mother, and one with my family. This was a mistake. No one should try to eat that much food in one day, that is for sure.

As expected, there was a lot of food. I offered to make something for dinner one, but I asked much too late, so there was nothing that needed to be made. We had green bean casserole, awesome stuffing, turkey and gravy, homemade cranberry sauce by boyfriend's grandmother, asparagus, mashed potatoes, and... oh, there was more, but I can't even remember. I had another serving of the stuffing, despite knowing about the second dinner that was awaiting me.

Oh, and then like an hour after gorging myself on food, they brought out pies. I was practically falling asleep on couch while his family played Boggle. I would have not played with them even if I had been awake, as Boyfriend Bird can get stupidly high scores. His little sister is now quite a monster at it as well, so I am afraid to try to play with them. But back to the pies.

I don't know about you, but when I think of Thanksgiving pies, I think of only two: pumpkin pie and pecan pie. I have two confessions to make about Thanksgiving pies.

I have never liked pumpkin pie, ever.

Until last year, I had never had pecan pie.

(Mama Bird always made me an apple or cherry pie for Thanksgiving. I was a spoiled little bird.)

So this year, when the pies came out, I looked at them, and had to think for a while. I knew I didn't need those pies, given that I was going to be eating in maybe another two hours. And given the whole 'on a diet' thing, too. Thanksgiving is probably the worst time to diet, isn't it? So the pumpkin pie wasn't even tempting, even with a scoop of vanilla ice cream next to it. The pecan, however, was tempting me. I had only had it once, and it had been insanely sweet. Was it always that sweet? With that weird texture? I had to test this theory.

So I had a half of a piece, and it was delicious and totally worth the calories.

Then we migrated over to my family's house, where more food awaited us. One of my aunts came over, and she made us fried.... sausage bread balls. I want the recipe, although I know I should never make those again, because they were surely terrible for me.

The first thing I did when I got home was set up my mother's slow cooker. To make mulled wine. I did not take any pictures, since the kitchen was full of work, and I didn't really want to try to explain to my aunt why I was taking pictures of a slow cooker. It was also really dark in there.

So yes, I made up a batch of Stephanie from A Year of Slow Cooking's Mulled Wine.
Sadly, I am really not a red wine fan. I go to a wine tasting after work every Friday, so I should have seen this coming. But I wanted to like it so badly I ignored that I hated the little taste of the wine I took when I was pouring it in. I even tried to have a glass with dinner, and got scolded for putting such hot liquid in a wine glass. That probably was a little foolish, I'll admit that.

But Mama Bird liked the wine, and so did Boyfriend Bird's father. He and his fiancée had a most of it, I would say. So while I was disappointed, I guess it wasn't a failure.

Second dinner did not go nearly as well for me. I had like four sausage balls before, so any hunger that had been thinking of returning to me stayed far away instead. Mama Bird made many things, that all smelled wonderful, but I just could not eat. I had a tiny amount of turkey, of mashed potatoes, a pittance of stuffing, and a dinner roll with homemade jelly. I think that was it. I just sat there and moaned about how I wanted to eat. Boyfriend Bird managed to eat, and I was proud of his efforts.

Immediately after dinner, my mother brewed some coffee. And I remembered I had promised Boyfriend Bird I would make pumpkin spiced lattes for him. Also from A Year of Slow Cooking. Only this time I didn't have 2 hours to prepare it, and I started panicking a little, until I remembered we had a stove.

And I felt rightly silly.

We didn't have espresso, either. I did not make myself any, because I dislike coffee, so although I tried it I had no real opinion. It was very well received, though. Except for the bottom fourth of Boyfriend Bird's, which was nothing but spices. I felt bad for not stirring his enough.

Then after we sat around for a few hours, Mama Bird decided it was time for dessert. I was no longer completely stuffed, so I agreed. We had two pumpkin pies- Sister Bird wanted a lot of leftovers. She was feeling well enough by then to have a small bite, but she was completely better the next day. We also had a pumpkin parfait that I made, and a cheesecake that hailed from my great-grandfather.

The cheesecake was a bit of a joke through the whole day, actually. Mama Bird had to beg the recipe from him, after he had made it every year. He very begrudgingly wrote it down for her, and when he handed it to her, he looked her in the eye and said 'You'll never make this correctly. I'm the only one who can.'

I spent most of the day reminding her of that, but in a loving way. But I will say that he was very wrong; her cheesecake was delicious. Someday I will attempt to make it as well and maybe even share the recipe.

My favorite Thanksgiving dessert is decidedly the pumpkin parfait. I used to find out where my mother had put it after making it, and then move it to a different freezer and bury it deep, so I was the only one who could find it. And I would eat the whole thing. No regrets. This year was no different, except that now I encourage others to eat it so I don't. Oh, how things change.

Pumpkin Parfait, from Mama Bird's recipe box
(Serves 9, approximately $1.12 per serving)
Ingredients

1.5 cup graham cracker crumbs

1/4 cup sugar

1/4 cup melted butter

1.5 cup pumpkin

1/2 cup brown sugar

1/2 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon cinnamon

1/4 teaspoon ginger

1/8 teaspoon cloves

1 quart softened vanilla ice cream

Directions

1. Combine sugar, graham crackers, and butter.
   
2. Press into 9" pan.
   
3. Combine pumpkin, brown sugar, salt, cinnamon, ginger, and cloves in mixing bowl.
   
4. Fold into ice cream.
   
5. Pour into pan.
   
6. Freeze until firm, and keep covered.
   

I could eat this every day of the holidays. It's not a pronounced pumpkin flavor, which I think is a big part of why I like it. I advise against trying to resist its charms.

Today's lessons learned:

• Even if pumpkin pie is gross, you probably don't hate pumpkin flavor as much as you think.
  

Mongolian Beef, a love affair

This picture was taken with my phone, so it's really not a great picture. It is Mongolian Beef from A Year of Slow Cooking, one of my favorite cooking blogs. The modifications I made are down at the bottom of this. Her blog is the only cooking blog I really follow, aside from TasteSpotting, which I don't consider a blog. I made the sauce and cut the flank steak at home, and then took it to Statt Bird's apartment, where I cornstarch'd the meat and then plopped in all in the slow cooker for about six hours. I stirred it far too often.

But my friend's apartment smelt like delicious slow cooking flank steak, garlic, onion, along with soy sauce, ginger, red pepper flakes, and more.  This was my third time making it, and it has never failed to amaze.  I also made a bed of white rice and steamed broccoli to go along with it, although I didn't make enough broccoli or rice. We didn't have a big enough pot for more than three cups of rice, and I had six heads of broccoli. A bird friend I wasn't expecting also came, and although we had more than enough meat (which I did not expect at all), we did not have enough sides for everyone to get as much as they wanted.

Overall, the Mongolian Beef was a success. One of my bird friends (who I believe I will dub Jujyfruits Bird. He'd understand.) had me send his girlfriend the recipe, and she assured me 'if he says that it's really good twice, then he really likes it.'

After dinner we were going to just play games and then I was going to make apple dumplings around 10 or so. We ended up going to a local game night and playing Killer Bunnies. The game made no sense, largely because the directions were far too complicated, and I didn't really enjoy it much at all. It also meant we didn't get home until 11, and I was in no mood to eat the dumplings at midnight or later, so we didn't do them. We may tonight.

Today, aside from going to Statt Bird's again, Boyfriend Bird and I are going to make pizza bagels (again), and do who knows what for dinner. My only goals for the day are to finish my writing for NaNoWriMo, make the dumplings, and take a shower when I am home. I'd like to also play some Fable, or do some reading, but. I know how my life gets out of control.

Thanksgiving this week! I am in charge of making appetizers for Mama Bird, although I will be at Boyfriend Bird's house before our Thanksgiving dinner. I will probably get her to try to slow cook things. I am becoming a slow cooking monster.

Mongolian Beef from A Year of Slow Cooking
(Serves 4+, approximately $12.25 per serving)

Ingredients

1.5 pounds flank steak

4 cloves of chopped garlic

3 sliced green onions, and an extra you'll never remember to put as garnish that will eventually be thrown away in frustration when you find it a month later.

1/2 an onion, diced

1/2 cup soy sauce

1/4 cup white wine

1/4 cup cooking sherry

1/2 tablespoon white wine vinegar, or red wine or whatever random 'flavor' of vinegar you have

1 teaspoon sesame oil

1 teaspoon molasses

1 teaspoon ginger

1/4 teaspoon black pepper, or however many grinds you want until you get bored.

1.5 teaspoons red chili pepper flakes

1/2 tablespoon peanut butter

1 tablespoon brown sugar

1/4 cup cornstarch

Directions

1. Add all ingredients except the meat and cornstarch to slow cooker.
   
2. Slice meat into thin strips, or little chunks.
   
3. Toss meat in bag with cornstarch, coating as best you can.
   
4. Put meat in slow cooker, stirring slightly to coat in sauce.
   
5. Cover and cook on low for about 5 hours.
   
6. Serve over rice with broccoli, or whatever veggies you're after.
   
7. If you remember, garnish with extra green onion on top. You will never remember this step.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• Sometimes you don't need or want dessert. This happens rarely.
  
• It is okay to walk away from a bad board game.
  
• I need to learn to better judge how much food I'm making.