Pitas appear to be beyond me.

Aha, and ya'll thought I forgot about my mission to re-cook everything I ate in England, didn't you? The one I gave the ridiculously British-sounding name to? Well, I didn't forget at all!

I'm just bad at cooking things in a timely manner, it seems.

The original version of this dish came from the Jazz Cafe, and it was one of the things I was most looking forward to. And it turned out deliciously. Everything except the pita, which I attempted to make on my own. The bread tasted fine, but you know how pitas are supposed to have little pockets, for putting food inside...?

Mine were just sad and flat. I didn't even take a picture of it, because it made me so sad.

I did take a picture of the final product, though.



So many colors! If I had not made whole-wheat pitas, then maybe there would have been even more, but I appear to be obsessed with whole-wheat. I think that's a good thing, it makes me feel healthier.

These are really easy to make. Mixing together the tabbouleh and tzatziki can be day the day before, even, and the lamb patties only take minutes to throw together. It takes a while only to chop everything up by hand. I'm a horrendously slow food chopper, so it still took me about half an hour, but Mama Bird could have done it in probably 10. I guess that should be my next goal: improving my chopping skills...

Recipe from All About You
(Makes 8 servings, with 338 calories and $2.02 per serving)
Lamb Patties

18 ounces ground lamb

4 tablespoons breadcrumbs

1 egg

zest of 1 lemon

2 teaspoons oregano

3 garlic cloves

2 tablespoons olive oil

1. Mix all ingredients but olive oil in bowl until well combined.
   
2. Shape into eight patties.
   
3. Place on tray and chill in fridge for at least 15 minutes.
   
4. Heat oil, and fry over medium to high heat for 4 to 5 minutes each side.
   
5. Drain on kitchen towel.
   
6. Serve with tabbouleh, pita, and tzatziki sauce.
   

Tabbouleh

2 ounces couscous

2 ounces fresh parsley

1 ounce fresh mint

1/2 red onion

3 tablespoons olive oil

3 tablespoons lemon juice

1. Put dry couscous in bowl and pour in 1/2 cup of hot water.
   
2. Stir, then cover and let sit until water is absorbed.
   
3. Fluff with fork, and add remaining ingredients. Chill before serving.
   

Tzatziki Sauce

1 cup greek yogurt

1 cucumber

1 green onion

2 cloves garlic

1 tablespoon mint

3 tablespoons lemon juice

1. Peel and dice cucumber.
   
2. Combine all ingredients and stir well.
   
3. Refrigerate for at least 30 minutes before serving.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• I chop things very slowly.
  
• Pitas without pockets are a lot like naan.
  

Jalapeno Cheddar Cornbread.

I love cornbread. Love, love, love cornbread. I recently went to Boston Market with someone I'll dub Model Bird, and he commented that I must not like cornbread because I didn't touch the piece they gave me.

"No, I love cornbread," I replied modestly. "I just know that I can make much better cornbread than they can."

So I did. And if anyone thinks this isn't better than Boston Market cornbread... well, then they certainly aren't any friend of mine.



My mother was concerned about the jalapeno being in it. I was disappointed to realize that the jalapeno lost its bite once cooked. I should have known that, but I forget things sometimes. It still had a pleasant little kick.





This is definitely not healthy cornbread. I have a separate recipe I do for that. You could probably half the amount of cheese in the recipe and still be happy with it. But if you're gonna make unhealthy cornbread, you may as well go all the way...

Recipe from Food Network.
(Makes 16 squares, with 295 calories and $0.60 per squares.)

3 cups all-purpose flour

1 cup yellow cornmeal

1/4 cup sugar

2 tablespoons baking powder

2 teaspoons kosher salt

2 cups milk

3 eggs

1/2 pound unsalted, melted butter

8 ounces aged extra-sharp Cheddar

1/3 cup chopped scallions (3 scallions)

3 tablespoons fresh jalapeno peppers

1. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.
   
2. Combine the flour, cornmeal, sugar, baking powder, and salt.
   
3. Combine the milk, eggs, and butter in a separate bowl.
   
4. Mix wet and dry ingredients carefully, not over-stirring.
   
5. Mix in 2 cups of grated cheese, scallions, and jalapenos.
   
6. Let sit at room temperature for 20 minutes.
   
7. Pour batter into pan and sprinkle with remaining cheddar.
   
8. Bake 30 to 35 minutes.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• Jalapenos lose some of their kick when they're cooked.
  
• Bread gets moldy if you don't take care of it. It gets moldy faster if it's laced with cheese.
  

Strawberry Banana Muffins.... and a necklace.

For some reason, I wanted to take my picture of this muffin with the necklace that I had recently bought. So I did.



Sadly, I don't have any pictures of the muffins that don't have the necklace, and none of them came out terribly well, so... I wish I had realized that before I ate all of the muffins. The necklace is gorgeous, and can be found on Lisa Leonard Designs. Her pictures of it are much, much better!

And please, I already have been informed of the irony of a bird wearing a bird necklace.

As for the muffin... well, I am not a big fan of bananas, so it amused Mama Bird that I would opt to make muffins with bananas. Especially since I had to fight Papa Bird for the bananas, which caused some tension for a few days. But she makes delicious banana bread, so I knew I liked banana flavor, just not something else about them.

These were much more successful than the cherry muffins. I'm not a huge fan of when I get a bite that's all banana and no strawberry, but I'm sure normal people who like bananas would disagree with me. Even with my disdain for bananas, I thought these were pretty delicious, and they will be staying in the breakfast rotation.

Recipe from A Pookie Pantry.
(Makes 17 muffins, with 140 calories and $0.25 per serving)

1/4 cup unsalted butter

1/4 cup applesauce

3/4 cup light brown sugar

2 eggs

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

2 large ripe bananas

1 cup strawberries

2.25 cups all-purpose flour

1.5 teaspoons baking powder

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 teapoon salt

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
   
2. Whisk together brown sugar, eggs, vanilla extract, and mashed bananas.
   
3. Add applesauce and melted butter and stir to combine.
   
4. In another bowl, combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, and salt.
   
5. Gently fold in the strawberries, making sure they are coated with flour .
   
6. Add wet ingredients to the dry ingredients and stir until just combined. Do not overmix.
   
7. Bake 20 to 25 minutes.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• Bananas: sometimes acceptable.
  

Muffins for... Dessert

When I took the first bite of these muffins, I was sort of concerned. They were... sweet. Not sugary, but definitely sweet. I got worried. I had been doing such a great job at staying away from sweets (let's pretend Easter candy doesn't exist for a moment, please.), and surely these would tempt me back over to the Sweet Side.

Let's also pretend that I haven't been wanting to make homemade Pop-Tarts for a long time.

But I was over-reacting. These are cornbread muffins; even sweet cornbread isn't sugary. So I happily munched on them for a few weeks, until I made an amazing discovery.



These muffins are delicious with jam on top. Strawberry is the best, trust me. Sadly, I discovered this information too late, as there were only two muffins left. So while these may not be the greatest for breakfast, they make amazing snacks. Heck, I'd eat this as a dessert. Just warm up the jam before you put it on. Or if you're me, get up in the middle of the game you were playing with your friends, go into the other room, and pretend they don't think you're crazy for taking pictures of a muffin.

Or you could just eat them for breakfast. Whatever you want, really.

Recipe from Cooking on the Side
(Makes 18 muffins, with 142 calories and $0.14 per muffin)

1.5 cups all-purpose flour

2/3 cup sugar

1/2 cup corn meal

1 tablespoon baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

1.25 cups milk

2 large eggs

1/3 cup vegetable oil

3 tablespoons melted butter

1. Preheat oven to 350.
   
2. Combine flour, sugar, cornmeal, baking powder, and salt.
   
3. Combine milk, eggs, vegetable oil, and butter in separate bowl and mix well.
   
4. Add wet ingredients to dry and stir until well blended.
   
5. Pour into muffin cups.
   
6. Bake for 18-20 minutes.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• Muffins can be eaten for dessert. Just like their cousin the cupcake.
  

Too Many Cherries

Here's a little secret about Ms. Brown Bird: I think those chocolate-covered cherry candies are disgusting. There. I've said it. I do like cherries, though. So when I found a bag of frozen cherries that time had forgot in our freezer, I decided they'd be delicious in my next batch of muffins.

The cherries are lucky I didn't just throw them in a cobbler, frankly. It was so tempting.

These muffins... were not what I expected. Maybe that's because I messed up. Well. Almost definitely because I messed up, honestly. Let's be fair. Where did I go wrong? I'll let you head over to Tastorama first, so you can see what I thought I was going to be making.

Aren't they pretty?



At this point, I realized I shouldn't have chopped the cherries. But it was too late to fix that, so I just kept going until I had put the whole bag in. Mama Bird and I had an interesting conversation right about this point.

Mama: "Wow, that's... pink. How many cherries did you put in?"
Me: "Two cups..."
Mama: "Really? That bag was only two cups of cherries?"
Me: "Well, it was 16 ounces."
Mama: "...And?"
Me: "Well, 8 ounces is a cup, so 16 ounces should have been two cups. So I didn't measure, I just put them all in."

I was feeling very smug right then. I could do basic math, I knew a lot of conversions, and I had saved myself from having to wash a measuring cup. A complete victory, right?

Mama Bird then pointed out a few important things to me. 1) Two cups of chopped cherries and two cups of whole cherries are very different amounts. 2) Most objects aren't exactly 8 ounces to a cup, that's just a generally accepted conversion.

So. I had a lot of extra cherry flavor in these.



And my cutting board vaguely reminded me of a scene from Dexter.



They looked... sickly when they came out of the oven. There's really no other word for it. I was quite upset about it, because I am far too cheap to throw away muffins.

Oh. Did I mention I burned them slightly? Not really burned, but they were browned on the bottom, and I would always rather under-bake something. I've been on a streak of over-baking, it would seem...



But, honestly, they aren't actually bad. The flavor is very cherry-ful. Mama Bird is a fan of them, so not all is lost. They also freeze wonderfully, so my dream of eating muffins for breakfast every day continues. Next up will be a banana-strawberry muffin, but before I post them I'll have to share what else I made last week, and my mother's day gift to Mama Bird!

Recipe from Tastorama
(Makes 24 muffins, with 136 calories and $0.19 per muffin.)

3 cups minus 2 tablespoons flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

2 teaspoons baking powder

1/4 teaspoons salt

1 cup sugar

1/2 cup vegetable oil

1 egg

1 cup yogurt

2 cups cherries

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

1. Preheat oven to 385.
   
2. Combine flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt in one bowl.
   
3. In separate bowl, whisk together sugar, oil, vanilla, egg, and yogurt.
   
4. Add the wet ingredients to dry, then fold in cherries.
   
5. Scoop batter into muffin pan.
   
6. Bake for 25 minutes.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• 8 ounces is not always a cup.
  
• Not all fruit in muffins is diced.
  
• Measuring chopped fruit and whole fruit is very important.
  

'Authentic' Chicken Vindaloo has habaneros, right?

I have led a sheltered life in terms of Indian food. Papa Bird dislikes curry, and so our family never really experienced Indian while I was growing up. The first time was in England, when we went to The Eastern Eye and I took terrible pictures. And I was smitten almost instantly with the foreign flavors.

When we came back, I dragged Boyfriend Bird to a local Indian place, and then went to a different place with the family. And then I discovered The Indian Slow Cooker: 50 Healthy, Easy, Authentic Recipes, due to my obsession with cooking blogs. The book was written by Anupy Singla of Indian as Apple Pie.

I'm proud to say I didn't immediately one-click purchase the book, because I'm trying to work on my impulse buying. Why, just today I managed to talk myself out of buying a box of cookie cutters. I looked through it on Amazon, saw a few things I really wanted to try, and decided that I'd make one, and if I liked it I would buy it. Like a little test-taste. And oh, rest assured, I purchased the book the same day I made the dish.

I picked out Chicken Vindaloo, because I remembered a waiter telling me that it was one of the spicier things on their menu. I had been disappointed once I actually got the dish- it tasted wonderful, but spicy? There was absolutely no spice to speak of. So I decided that I was going to test and see just how spicy this could be. Besides, the group of friends I was cooking for this time enjoys spice quite a bit.

They probably deserve bird names by now... I shall dub them Ninja Bird, Uncountable Bird, and Ocarina Bird. There. Moving on.

I think Uncountable Bird and I have similar spice tolerances, despite him saying he had a very low one. I think mine is actually lower than I want to admit. Ninja and Ocarina Bird seem like they have a higher but also similar level, and Darth Bird's spice tolerance is absolutely stupid.

Obtaining everything I needed for this was slightly tricky, in that it called for black mustard seeds and I didn't know where to buy those, and the Giant and Harris Teeter near me don't carry the chilis I wanted. Or any of the other peppers she listed. Darth Bird scored the mustard seeds, but I decided I wanted to make sure this vindaloo was spicy, so I just decided to get habanero chilis instead.

Well, that plan certainly worked.

Let's do a quick review of the levels of spicy here... the recipe called for 6-10 bird's eye chilis, serrano peppers, or cayenne peppers. The spiciness of a pepper can be measured with the Scoville Rating. In fact, if you're planning on substituting some peppers for another, it's not a bad idea to try to grab one from the same place on the scale. Bird's eye chilis rank from 50,000 to 100,000, which is nothing to joke around with. Serranos are only 10,000 to 25,000, and cayenne are only slightly hotter at 30,000 to 50,000. So I would have been disappointed if I had got a hold of serrano peppers after all. The only pepper that would really have given me heat would have been the birds eye.

Habanero are ranked at 100,000 to 350,000. So the hottest bird's eye is as potent as the weakest habanero. Thank god I only put three of those suckers in.



Cutting up the onions was actually one of the most time consuming parts of this. Partially because I cut up 12 onions, and partially because I realized I was starting to run behind and I sliced my index finger in the middle of the ninth onion. I then danced around my house, sucking on my finger and whining to my dog. It was nearly five minutes before it stopped bleeding enough for the neosporin to stick to my finger and not just the blood, and then I had to put a big band-aid on it. And call Mama Bird and ask her to chop the habaneros, because there was no way I was touching them with that big of a cut.

I think my pain amused her.



We had nearly uncountable onions.



I also made homemade naan for this little adventure, which I think turned out pretty well. It was slightly less flavorful than I would have hoped, but it was received well enough. Mama and Boyfriend Bird both thought it went really well with hummus, so I guess I know what to do next time I want to mess around with hummus.



This is where two of the major changes to this recipe were made. One was on purpose, the other was entirely accidental. As I said earlier, I switched habanero peppers for serrano, because that was what I had and because I wanted it to be spicy. The accidental change was a direct result of my inability to read, and instead of putting EIGHT inches of ginger root in the mixture, I only put one. That's a lot of missing flavor.



I know this is a bad picture, but I just wanted to make sure that everyone was aware that you cannot grind peppercorns like this. It will not work. Just measure out ground peppercorns next time, unless you have a real mortar and pestle. And then, if you don't, don't dump this mixture in with the onion and watch with despair as they aren't ground at all, and you end up with pureed onions with some peppercorns and mustard seeds.

But if you do, the peppercorns will soften up in the six hours of cooking, and it will be okay. Not perfect. But trust me, it really will not be as bad as you think it will.



Overall, I was pleased with this. I thought it was a great level of spice; it wasn't overpowering, but it built with time so by the end of the meal I had a wonderful burn going. I made the mistake of giving myself too much rice, so I was completely stuffed and couldn't even finish my plate. I tupperware'd it up and it was just as delicious the next day.

When Mama Bird told me that it wasn't spicy at all. Mama Bird is definitely insane.

But Ocarina Bird's father, who dislikes curry, tried this and enjoyed it. So hopefully I'll talk Papa and Boyfriend Bird into trying some too. Otherwise, I guess I'm going to have enough leftovers to last me a week.

Note: I am reprinting this recipe because you can already view it through the Amazon 'take a peek!' feature, and because I accidentally made a few changes anyway. If anyone tells me I really shouldn't post this, I'll take it down.

Chicken Vindaloo adapted from The Indian Slow Cooker: 50 Healthy, Easy, Authentic Recipes
(Makes 13 servings, with 260 calories and $1.65 per serving)

12 medium yellow onions

6 tablespoons vinegar

1 inch ginger

20 cloves garlic

3 habanero chilis

1 tablespoon turmeric

1 tablespoon ground coriander

1 tablespoon garam masala

1 tablespoon black peppercorns

1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

1 tablespoon coarse salt

1 tablespoon black mustard seed

4 pounds chicken

1/2 cup water

1. Cut up onions and saute, then add vinegar and cook until vinegar has evaporated.
   
2. Puree the onions with rock salt, peppercorns, and mustard seed.
   
3. Puree ginger root, garlic, habaneros (with stems removed), turmeric, coriander, garam masala, and cinnamon.
   
4. Put chicken, ginger puree, and onion puree in slow cooker. Add water, and cook on low for six hours.
   

Naan from Budget Bytes (Makes 8 naan, with 213 calories and $0.44 per naan)

2 teaspoons dry active yeast

1 teaspoon sugar

1/2 cup water

3 cups flour

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/4 cup vegetable oil

1/3 cup plain greek yogurt

1 egg

1. Combine yeast, sugar, and water, and let sit for a few minutes.
   
2. Stir in oil, yogurt, and egg until well mixed.
   
3. In separate bowl, combine 1 cup of flour with salt, then wet ingredients.
   
4. Continue adding flour at a half cup at a time until it's impossible to stir with a spoon and doesn't stick to your hands.
   
5. Knead dough ball for about three minutes.
   
6. Loosely cover dough and let rise for about 45 minutes.
   
7. Cut into 8 equal pieces, and shape those into balls.
   
8. Cut a skillet over medium heat and PAM it.
   
9. Roll out one dough ball at a time, and place on skillet.
   
10. Flip once the dough is golden brown on one side.
    
11. Remove and serve warm if possible.
    

Today's lessons learned:

• Just use ground peppercorns.
  
• Habaneros are spicy. Mama Bird is wrong.
  
• 8 inches of ginger and 1 inch of ginger are very different.
  
• If you let your friends draw on your hands with fountain pens, it may take a full week to come off. Very odd.
  

Bigger Muffin, Bigger Breakfast

I should have shared these muffins with the world when I first made them. Sadly, I only had 18 muffins, and there is strong evidence that 18 muffins isn't enough to feed the world. It's not even enough muffins to last me through a month of breakfast.

These are probably the most flavorful muffins that I've made since I started this breakfast muffin fest. The blueberry muffins have so far had my favorite texture, but these rival them. The blueberry are fluffy and sort of sugary, but these combine the fluffiness of warm muffin, oatmeal, the crunchiness of nuts and apple, and the chewiness of dried fruit... I will most definitely be making these muffins again. Not right away, because I am out of craisins and have some cornbread I need to use up, but definitely within a few months.

It might be a little hard to tell from the picture, but...



I finally started making decently sized muffins. Notice how only one didn't puff up above the caking cups this time? With the muffin sizes I was making before I think I'd have no problem making this recipe make 24 muffins, but they'd be tiny little breakfasts. I'm trying to eat more at breakfast, since I've finally admitted that 200 calories is probably the minimum I should eat in the morning. (These are only 177. But I'm getting close!)

On a side note: I started PAM'ing the muffin cups before filling with batter, and they all just slip right out. I'm back to being happy that I bought these.

I don't think I am supposed to re-print this recipe, but if you want it, here is where you can find it: Apple Nut Oatmeal Muffins from Crepes of Wrath. (Makes 18 muffins, about $0.42 and 177 calories per muffin)

Today's lessons learned:

• Grating apples makes a ton of juice, and not as much apple as I'd expect.
  
• Adding chopped nuts does wonders for the texture of muffins.
  
• Apple sauce in muffins? Smart.
  

Wonton Crackers and Smoky Hummus

Mama Bird and I hosted a book club with some friends a few weeks ago. I say 'book club' loosely, as although we finally had an assigned book, I was the only one who read it. It's much more a collection of women who get together and drink wine and talk for the night. And play some games.

It's interesting for me, being the youngest member by far. The rest of the women have children, and more than one have grown children, so I guess I'm the generation gap-filler. But it's interesting to just sit and talk with them. The conversation flows fine, I don't feel intimidated, and it's just like talking with any other group of people. When did talking to 'adults' stop being scary? When did I start to count as an adult?

There weren't many of us last week, so we didn't go overboard. I made some crackers and hummus,
and tried to take an extra 20 seconds to plate it nicely. And for once I actually kind of like how it looked. Mind, I'm still a terrible photographer. But you can still probably see the improvement!



Everything was surprisingly easy to make, except the exploding tahini can. But I'll explain that once I get to talking about the hummus.



You start off by just cutting wonton wrappers. I used the new meat scissors Mama Bird bought. Was that bad? That didn't even occur to me until now. I guess they can be sharpened, so it can't be that big of a deal...



It's not terribly clear here, but the wrapper on the left has been brushed with a ton of the sweet and salty mixture of honey, soy sauce, and egg white. I ended up with a bit too much each time and so some crackers had a thicker layer on them. I don't think Boyfriend Bird was a fan of that, but I didn't mind.



I used poppy seeds for these. Why? We didn't have sesame and I was too lazy to go to the store. This does change the cost of the whole thing by a little, as I believe sesame is more expensive, and of course it changed the flavor. I was fine with them, but someday I'd love to try the sesame seeds instead.

I also didn't get a super even spread with the sugar/salt/seed mixture, as you might be able to tell. This makes part of it have a lot more of an intense flavor. Next time I may try to mix the dry mix in with the egg mixture and see if it spreads better. That was really my only complaint about these, honestly.



The first time I made these I followed Martha's directions and sprayed the wrappers so they wouldn't stick. The second, I didn't. The second time, they stuck to the paper. How shocking. Next time I will PAM the parchment paper, and hopefully that'll fix the problem.

Sigh. I miss them, now that I've eaten them all.

But now for the story of that hummus...



It doesn't look great that way, does it? Well, I sort of think it does. But the smell was what really impressed me right then. The mixing of cumin, curry powder, red pepper flakes, Sriracha, Frank's... it was wonderful.

I have no recipe for the hummus, because I just sort of played it by ear for part of it. I'll make it again and try to actually measure my ingredients, but I can tell you it was probably around a teaspoon of Sriracha or more, and a few teaspoons of Frank's Red Hot, with the spices, garbanzo beans, and tahini. The tahini was a nightmare to get out of the tin, an absolute nightmare. Unfortunately both grocery stores near me only carry one version, so I will have to find a better way to use it. The oil and paste completely separate, and I had a hell of a time trying to mix them together. If anyone has any ideas about that, I'd love to hear them.

The only problem I had with it? I think it's a little dry. If anyone recalls, I actually taste tested two hummus flavors: smoky and lemon. The lemon turned out far too watery, and I think I overcompensated. Sister Bird (and everyone else who's tried this hummus) enjoy it this way, but I think next time I'll had a teaspoons of oil to make it slightly less solid.



So there you have it. Easy hummus and chips you can make for a party. Or for yourself. These would make a great lunch for a healthy week. I should take my own advice here, I've been eating just apples and yogurt for lunch for weeks now. Maybe I'll make myself something more interesting.

Sesame Wonton Crackers from Martha Stewart
(Makes 5 servings, about $0.75 and 192 calories per 10 crackers)

1 large egg white

2 tablespoons honey

1 teaspoon soy sauce

2 teaspoons sugar

1/2 teaspoon coarse salt

Pinch of black pepper

2 tablespoons black sesame seeds

24 wonton wrappers, cut diagonally

1. Preheat oven to 375.
   
2. Line baking sheets with parchment paper.
   
3. Beat together egg white, honey, and soy sauce.
   
4. In separate bowl, mix together sugar, salt, pepper, and sesame seeds.
   
5. Cut wonton wrappers and arrange on parchment paper in single layer.
   
6. Using a pastry brush and holding the wrappers down, generously cover wrappers with egg mixture and sprinkle with seed mixture.
   
7. Bake until golden, rotating in the middle, for 7-9 minutes.
   

Today's lessons learned:

• Hummus really is as easy as everyone says.
  

Four Pounds of Frozen Turkey, huh.

I talked Mama Bird into cleaning out our huge freezer in the basement on Monday. Why? I have no idea. Maybe I'm crazy, or maybe I just like knowing what's going to waste in our house. The second is more likely this time. I've spent far too much money this month on things- mostly on myself, but on other people too! Sister Bird and I are going to go see Wicked, and I bought the tickets for that, I (finally) secured one of Boyfriend Bird's birthday presents (only a few months late, too), I got myself a tattoo, and somehow have spent 160 on groceries.

Yes, we are gonna gloss right over that tattoo comment. But I'll post pictures of it someday.

We found a lot of things in that freezer that I intend to use. Frozen cherries, for one, that will either be my next muffins or will become cobbler. We also found a ton of frozen meat, including four pounds of ground turkey, two or three of ground beef, and the holy grail of Omaha Steak purchases. So my cooking will be dedicated to cleaning out the cabinets for a little while instead of buying new things.

Which is a shame because I have already picked out the recipes I need to make the lamb pita for mission: dodgy grub. Putting it off for longer is taking quite a toll on my patience. I also bought a kitchen scale for no apparent reason, but I can now measure portions even better than before.

But the realization that I've let frugality escape me, and the purchase of this scale, has made me decide to try something new with the blog. I'm going to start calculating the cost of a meal when I post a recipe, so I can keep track of things I should make when I've gone overboard on buying again. The scale should also help me track portions better, so I will attempt to calculate how many servings and calories per serving are in each recipe. Who knows how accurate the measurements will be, but I'm sure it'll help me.

With all that said, what did I do with those four pounds of turkey? One is still relaxing in the freezer, waiting for me to consume it. The other three pounds were relocated to .Hack and 80s Birds' apartment, where Boyfriend Bird and I made it into burgers. I was a little skeptical of it, because although I know turkey can be substituted for ground beef in pretty much any recipe, I thought I'd miss the flavor. I won't lie, you know these are turkey. But you don't miss the beef at all. They're juicy, flavorful, and you don't even feel guilty eating them. I came extremely close to eating two.

Actually Delicious Turkey Burgers from All Recipes
(Makes 12 burgers, about $0.93 and 175 calories per burger)

3 pounds ground turkey

1/4 cup seasoned bread crumbs

1/4 cup finely diced onion

2 egg whites, lightly beaten

1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley

1 clove garlic, peeled and minced

1 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper

1. Mix everything together and form into 12 patties.
   
2. Cook in a medium-heat skillet or on a grill.
   

See? Extremely easy, cheap, and healthy. Don't forget to factor in the bun if you're counting calories, but your entire burger will probably only be about 300 calories. A little more if you're like me and add extra diced red onion and some smears of Sriracha.

Today's lessons learned:

• Ground turkey is not something to dread.
  
• Boyfriend Bird is quite skilled at dicing things...